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Connection. Communication. A sense of belonging. Love. Affection. A world without connection. An age of infinite connections. A fake virtual reality created in our heads. What is our world today? Today, our world is a landscape of ironies and contradictions. We are a world connected, yet we are not. We supposedly have everything we psychologically require, yet we do not. Social media is the thread connecting the entire world, yet it is also the last thread breaking it. Relationships can be as fragile as glass or as hard as steel. It depends on how strong the foundation is. In a digital age of supposed connections, the pressing issue and contradiction of our relationships hanging on a thread because of social media is worsening. The issue is that on the surface social media connects us but on a deeper level it is detrimental to any relationship in the long term and if used excessively. How? Well, it impacts all relationships on a deeper level like creating jealousy, sowing mistrust, the misuse of quality time etc.
To start, have any of you heard of FOMO? Well of course you have. Who hasn’t? Ever wondered where this ever-present desire to do everything and be a part of everything came from? It’s what you use every day to communicate and connect with others. The one and only, social media.
Social media usually presents people with idealised and supposedly perfect versions of their lives where they do so many things and have so much that it creates a sense of competition between friends and partners. Everyone feels like other people’s lives are better than their own, and jealousy starts to seep into the friendship along with a need for one-upmanship where friends feel the need to prove that they have better lives than others. This creates the notorious “Fear Of Missing Out,” where everyone needs to be a part of everything to maintain relationships, be cool, and fit in, creating false desires and shallow happiness which ironically weaken interpersonal relationships.
The relationships formed with social media are shallow because they are built on the foundations of jealousy, competition between best friends and partners as well as a fear of missing out, affecting the quality of time spent on relationships. Furthermore, it creates trust issues because so much online activity can be done anonymously. Due to this, one is not as scared of their online footprint because they know they can get away with a lot more untrackable secrets. An example of this? A good friend of mine was really upset because social media was the reason she lost one of her good friends from her old school. She had a friend in grade 7 who used to bully her online for no good reason by calling her names and making fun of her. In-person, however, he was really nice. It proves the idea that one can hide behind social media as a shield and create an atmosphere of distrust and discord because one is less conscious of their actions. Hence, you don't trust your friend or partner as much because you don’t always know what they’re up to on social media and for all you know they can be doing something horrible to you behind your back, like cheating on you. This is just one example of a negative impact on friend and partner relationships due to trust issues--ultimately, an unnecessary pattern of jealousy is created.
Next arises the issue of self-absorption. Everyone is on their phones, addicted to Instagram, TikTok or YouTube trying to fit in with the crowds and follow all the trends. Where does that leave their communication and bonding as a family? If everyone is immersed in external sources of pleasure and false relationships with friends, there is no time or energy left for the family to be close and bond. They don’t have any form of physical meaningful communication due to the addictive nature of social media. Furthermore, due to the secretive nature of social media, parents and children get used to this secrecy and don’t share as much as they would with each other, hindering both their development as individuals and their connections with one another. There was a phase where I got a bit addicted to social media and I didn’t communicate and spend much time with my family which led to issues with my sister as well as loneliness. This is because, on the surface, I’m building connections, but am I really? What am I gaining from hating my life and envying others? What am I gaining from half-baked conversations with hidden meanings and secrets galore. The true meaning of life comes from deeper connections that go deeper than the internet and the million connections of the web. True connection comes from interconnectedness within you. Watch the time you spend on social media and compare it to your happiness vs when you limit yourself and spend more time talking and interacting with family and friends. You will really see a difference.
Do we really want false, shallow relationships with multiple hidden layers of secrecy, jealousy and competition? Do we really want to hinder our development and our enjoyment by building such shallow relationships? Because social media is not our source of best connection. Social media is the thread that’s breaking it.
By: Anonymous author
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